Sunday, July 17, 2011

4 Distinguished Deaths In The Past Decade

It's a fact that there have been more dead people than alive people today. What does that mean? Impending zombie apocalypse? No, what it does means is that with the greater amounts of deaths, the greater chances of a good old moral story for the kids! Isn't every kids dream learning of how Uncle Bill died after consuming seven corn dogs laced with rat poison? It never hurts to teach young boy Tommy not to consume food freshly dipped from a mysterious vat of fluid because of that dare from your college friends.

Without further ado, here's four distinguished deaths that occurred in the past ten years.

Seung Seob Lee

This Korean twenty eight year old man isn't that different from average Joe. He's what you call a very "enthusiastic" gamer. He spent many hours at night playing video games such as Starcraft 2, which sadly ended his career short. Apparently, going to bed at around 6 AM and showing up early to work don't mix.

He lived in Taegu, South Korea, and his job included repairing boilers for a living. Not as exciting as fending off a Zerg Rush with the few marines you have at hand to defend your supply depots. He was a typical 'nerdy' guy, skinny with glasses. (Sounds a lot like you!)

His avid gaming obsession also ended his relationship with his "female friend" which was also a gamer. Good things don't last forever I guess right? After he lost his job, he decided to relieve some of the stress by playing a few rounds of Starcraft 2 in a internet cafe in the local area. Also, if you thought a few rounds meant two days straight with little to no sleep, then you would be absolutely correct. Smart bugger you are!

He played Starcraft for 50 consecutive hours, with only short breaks to power nap, use the bathroom and perhaps to digest a single saltine from the local bar's cigarette tray. Lee started on a Wednesday, August 3, 2005. He died on August 5.

It was like this, except with more death.

Luckily, his mother became concerned over his well-being, and asked his friends to bring him back home. Lee told his friends that he was almost done, and he would head back home once he was done with his session. After his friends left, he died a few minutes later.
People say that he fell off his chair onto the ground. He was still conscious at the moment, but people knew something was going wrong, they rushed him to the hospital where he later died. It was concluded that he died of heart failure due to dehydration and exhaustion. So maybe you pop a few "food pellets", take a few more naps, and drink a few liters of water before you decide to have your own little "game marathon"?

So apparently, playing Starcraft for 50 hours inside of a dimly lit, cigarette smoke-filled internet cafe without eating or sleeping isn't a good idea. His death contributed to the outcry in the gaming community about moderation and gaming addiction. So think about Lee Seung Seop before you say there's no such thing as "video game addiction".

Jennifer Strange

Jennifer's death was certainly a "strange" one. (Hah, see what I did there?) Although while she was still alive, she was just another Californian 28-year-old mother of three children. With the recent craze for game consoles such as the "Wii", she had to participate in a local radio station's contest, "Hold Your Wee For A Wii".

The contest promised a brand-smacking-new Nintendo Wii gaming console if you won the contest. What parent could sleep at night if they didn't give it a chance? Jennifer, being the loving mother she was, tried to win the contest. This fun loving contest included drinking as much water as you possibly can without going to the bathroom. A plan for success is what I call it.  

The contestants were given small eight-once bottles of water to drink every 15 minutes without using the bathroom. A fellow contestant said that they were tiny half-pint bottles, so it was going to be easy like fickle-sticks on rye. The same contestant that said that, quit after drinking five bottles, it was too much for him.

Jennifer and the other remaining contestants were given even larger bottles for the duration of the contest. The fellow contestant from before even talked to Jennifer, recalled that she was a nice lady, and told him about her three kids and how she was doing it for them. Now that's a true love.

Love wrapped in white.

Jennifer decided to go home early from work, at the "Radiological Associates of Sacramento". She told her supervisor that she had to go home because her head was "hurting her real bad". One of her co-workers recollect that she was crying before she went home, which was the last that anyone saw of her again.

She was found dead in her suburban house from water-intoxication on Friday, January 12 2007, a few hours after the contest. The radio station was enraged at it's employees and ten of them were fired immediately after the death. Later, the court ruled in favor for the family, and they were awarded $16.5 million dollars from the radio station. That's a little more then 94,117 Wii consoles, which is a little more then they originally intended to give to the 'winner'.

93230.87354503334 Wii's to be exact, but nobody wants one eighth of a game console.

Nonetheless, it's a real shame that she died due to such a cause. Hopefully, it'll bring some light towards the dangers of drinking too much water (a.k.a. Water-intoxication).

Vladimir Likhonos

Likhonos is just like any young adult, a young man with bright hopes for the future. He's a chemistry student at the Kiyv Polytechnical Institute and was probably pretty dedicated to his field of science.

He was sitting around, just like you and me, and suddenly spontaneously combusted. Just kidding, but he literally blew up. He was chewing some good, tasty bubble gum, but the flavor was slowly disappearing. One of life's little problems right? Well Likhonos decided he had enough, and dipped his chewed bubble gum into some citric acid to add some sharp sour flavor to his gum.

Oh wait, did I say citric acid? I meant explosives. He unknowingly dipped his gum into what he thought was citric acid, which was actually mysterious explosive powder.

My bad.

He blew off his entire jaw, and practically all of his lower face. Shows that its worth looking at labels of things before you put it in your mouth. Bang! Moral.

Garry Hoy

On 1993, July 9, Garry Hoy was suspiciously murdered by gravity. Middle-aged Garry was a lawyer at the Holden Day Wilson law firm. One day, he insisted to prove that a window in the Toronto Dominion Bank Tower was indestructible.

He decided that the perfect place to prove this was at the 24th floor of the tower, because why not.  Instead of testing the 'stability' of the window like a sane person with a hammer or object of some sorts, he decided to slam his body onto the window.

Obviously it was a win or die situation, after joking with his fellow friends and peers that the window wouldn't even budge open on a hot day, he obviously knew that he would be unable to walk away with his dignity if it broke. Therefore, the only logical thing to do is to body slam the window to prove that the window was unbreakable right?

Garry had actually presumably done this "stunt" a few times in the past to prove the strength of the window, and decided it was worth another go. He took a few steps back, and body slammed the window. It didn't budge. Just to put the icing on the cake, he did it again. Except this time, the window plopped out of its frame and Garry Hoy flew out of the window plunging to his unfortunate death.

Garry Hoy, was one of the firms brightest assets, and the lost of him contributed to the closure of the Holden Day Wilson law firm, which was one of the largest law firms in Canada at the time. The moral of the story is, don't bet your life on indestructible windows.

At least he didn't try it out with one of these windows.

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