Horrifying Tuesday: Premature Burial

As you may have noticed, we haven't had a "Horrifying Tuesday" segment since 1753! Thankfully, we will today! Instead of making an excuse relating to brainstorming a truly horrifying topic, I'll tell you the truth. I literally could not find the right topic to talk about. From super-sized crabs to crazy freak of natures, almost nothing compares to the fate of dying due to "premature burial". Even while  movies and TVs have you on the end of your seat praying that the main character will make it out alive, it's extremely difficult to capture the true essence of being buried alive.

This game on the other hand, captures the minute details of premature burial.

If you were declared legally dead and buried, your death would most likely be cause by suffocation. But what exactly does it mean to be suffocated to death? You'll probably just smack around for a few hours before succumbing to a familiar warm feeling of death, right? Unsurprisingly, it can be one of the most horrifying ways to die in the book of methods of dying.

Unless you wake up in a coffin full if angry dwarves with knives, you'll probably die from carbon dioxide poisoning and lack of oxygen in general. Every breath you take will further assure your slow and painful demise. If you thought that dying in a coffin would be comparable to slowly passing away in your sleep, you would be wrong, dead wrong.

Because you'll be dead.

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3 Things I Hate About Fall/Winter

As much as I love the cold compared to the blistering heat, there are some things about the season that I'm not very happy about. While this might come as a surprise to you, Fall and Winter aren't perfect despite what we crank them up to be. Sure, you can sleep comfortably and avoid the sweltering heat, but that doesn't mean there aren't any compromises.

1. Day Light Savings

We all know what day light savings is. It's that time of the year to switch your clocks back an hour. Just kidding, your magical technological contraptions will do it themselves! Anyways, we can all agree that getting an extra hour to sleep on Saturday is one of those little gifts from life to give you a break, right? So what's so bad about it? Does the Skyakes Staff hate rest? Do we have something against sleep and extra time?

Somebody stop that dog! Won't anyone think of the children?!

The problem with day light savings is that the benefits don't last forever. After getting a nice hour of extra sleep, what then? We suddenly change our minds and switch our clocks forward and call it a day? Of course not; we have to live with it until summer. Suddenly, we have to endure extremely bright mornings that feel like afternoons and late afternoons that look like sunsets.

Along with the region's seasonal day changes, the hour set-back pushes days to start earlier and end earlier. By the time you're leaving work or school, the sun is waving you goodbye and you end up stuck with lame ol' moon for the rest of your "leisure" time before the next full day of work.

Go away! Nobody wants you!

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Is Genetically Modified Food As Bad As We Think?

One of the recent hypes of the last decade was about the consumption of genetically modified food. According to certain people, eating genetically modified food is equal to eating six pounds of pure lard after consuming a entire vat of pure cyanide. Many people have felt strongly that such evil should be erased from the face of the earth and genetically modifying food should be banned indefinitely. But is all the hype true? Should we throw away the test tubes and textbooks and revert back to pushing seeds into the the ground one by one?

No more "science" witchery for us!

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Eco-Friendly Water Bottles - The Marketing Scheme

So, what's the big deal with the Eco-Friendly Water Bottles? Why all the 'hate' for such a great, sturdy bottle that uses less plastic? Is it because Skyakes hates baby seals and kangaroos? No, of course not! The actual reason, is the master-ruse the marketing department used to fool us all.

Water Bottles? Right.

When the first batch of eco-friendly bottles came out, we were all disappointed on how thin and weak the plastic was compared to previous bottles. However, as long as it's good for the environment, it's good enough for us right? Actually, no.

If you think about, what's going on really? They take a bottle with plastic, and re-design it with less plastic. Plastic costs money. Do you see where I'm getting at? They've found a way to market the same product, at somewhat lower quality and make it sound good. Even if you're not drinking the plastic itself, they're giving you less for what you paid for a few years ago.

But hold your horses for a moment, it's eco-friendly, you wouldn't want a hundred of "old" heavy bottles in the sea floor right? At least a hundred "new" light bottles in the sea floor isn't that bad right? Think about it though. If they wanted to, they could use the same amount of plastic, but produce two to three times the amount of bottles. What that means is lower production costs per bottle, and possibly two-three times more bottles produced. It's like buying a three bricks of gold at the price of one!

If this was any other product, such as chicken from KFC, would you be happy if they decided to use cheaper, thinner cardboard containers to hold your chicken? Of course not! Your chicken would be flopping on the ground everywhere before you reach your house!

But we have to admit, the real scheme is making us pay for a relatively free resources, at almost the same price of oil.

However, if you mix the two together, you get environmental disaster.

4 Reasons Your Pictures Are Horrible

So you just bought that new camera and you're so excited to test it out. So you tell your friends to go hang out with you at the mall, and you proceed to take a few pictures as you run around without a care in the world. By the end of the day, your memory card is full and you're hyped up to see your pictures. You plug the USB cord in the computer, and look at your pictures. A small tear flows out of your eyes as you see consistently under-exposed and mysteriously colored pictures. Obviously, you bought the wrong camera right?

For the most part, the end result of a picture is more determined by the photographer, not the camera. You can blame that camera for being bad all you want, but at the end of the day, it's your fault.

Then again, it might be time for a replacement.

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TGN1412 - The Catastrophic Human Drug Trials

The drug trials of TGN1412, or also known as "CD28-SuperMAB" is something out of a science fiction movie. The name that sounds like a science-cy evil pathogen of doom doesn't help either.

On March, 13, 2006, a drug trial was conducted on eight young healthy volunteers and since the title of this post is "The Catastrophic Drug Trials", one could assume it didn't end well.

Before I discuss what happened on that faithful day, I'll tell you what "TGN1412" is.

TGN1412 was the working name for a immunomodulation drug that was later withdrawn after certain events occurred. The drug was developed by the German company, TeGenero Immuno Therepeutics, tested by Parexel and manufactured by Boehringer-Ingelheim.

Picture not related. 

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How to Get Rid Of Revolting Breath

Bad breath eh? Your breath smells like six decaying otters and decomposed human feces mixed with cat tails eh? Well, I may just be able to help you out.

Disgusting! I mean, look at that hair!

Although most of the time, the problem may be obvious, sometimes people don't even know their breath makes you want to commit manslaughter in a extremely violent fashion towards them. So in order to avoid nice Uncle Rick from becoming Convicted of Manslaughter Uncle Rick, lets make sure you don't have bad breath.

• The best/simplest possible way is to ask someone. It doesn't hurt to turn to your left/right and ask the person next to you. Heck, it doesn't hurt to go downstairs and ask your mom. Do us all a favor and ask someone for confirmation.

It also doesn't hurt to stop making stupid faces, this guy thinks he's better then me or something!

Now, how do we get rid of this curse of infidelity bad breath?

• Clean your tongue. Doctors tell you you brush your teeth all the time, but do they really take the time to tell you to clean your tongue? It's common knowledge that your tongue takes up more space then your teeth inside of your mouth. It's like a fuzzy carpet in your houses front door, all the microbes will most likely collect there as you go on with your day. In emergency cases while eating with your girlfriends/boyfriends parents, you can technically use a spoon to "scrape" your tongue.
• Thankfully, most toothbrush nowadays have tongue cleaners on the back of the 'handy device'. If you aren't fortunate enough to have one, you can simply brush your tongue after you brush your teeth.

• Floss. This won't simply help your breath but your general oral health as well. Why not get some bacon-flavored floss and have the time of your life? A warning though, your gums will bleed due to the fact that you don't floss often, not like gushes and fountains of blood, but it might get messy if you floss too hard/violently. (If you find that your gums are bleeding, and you've floss beyond your gums and have reached the bones of your mouth, perhaps you should go a little bit lighter, also you should go to the emergency room.)

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