4 Ways To Avoid Alzheimer's

Alzheimer's is one of the most common form of dementia in the world today. Over 26 million people worldwide have been diagnosed with this disease and considering that it's currently irreversible and incurable, it's practically a death sentence for the people who receive the news. To make things more tangible, people generally live seven more years after their diagnosis of AD and after a certain stage, the procedures for "care giving" is simply to relieve discomfort until death. With Alzheimer's being such a serious complication, we suggest that you read the following timeline before death for the sake of knowledge and then continuing to the rest of the article.

Stage 1: Normal Function

This stage is pretty much as it sounds, your memory and cognitive abilities are only as limited as you've trained them. Considering that Alzheimer's is usually diagnosed at around the age of 65, you still have your whole life ahead of you if you're young.

Stage 2: Very Minor Impairment

Technically, this is the first stage of the Alzheimer's progression. At this stage, the person will only experience minor memory lapses and small everyday confusion. It's nearly impossible to detect Alzheimer's at this stage since the only symptoms can easily be mistaken for stress or sleep deprivation. Considering how minor they are, you'll hardly notice them; it could be as simple as those short lapses you get when you enter a room, or even which cabinet you keep you bowls in.

Stage 3: Minor Impairment

At this point, your confusion and forgetfulness may have increased by a few folds. By now, it would be visibly noticeable to the people around you that you've been becoming increasingly forgetful/confused. At stage 3, it's probable that you'll have slight difficulty remembering new things that you've just learned, such as names and words. (It could be as simple as stuttering for about three seconds while trying to recall a person's name) along with trouble organizing and planning for the future.

While possible, it is still difficult to detect AD at this stage.

Stage 4: Mild Impairment

By now, the clear-cut symptoms of Alzheimer's would be evident. Instead of simply forgetting a new person's name, you may/will suffer from moderate cognitive decline. Things such as managing money, planning a crazy retirement party or even recalling events that happened hours to days ago will become increasingly difficult. (Or at the very least, more difficult than before) At this stage, some people may become increasingly moody and emotional when in socially or mentally demanding situations. This stage is also called "early-stage Alzheimer's Disease".

Read more »

4 Ways To Determine Time of Death In a Dead Person

Regardless of your desire to know this information, we're here to discuss the four primary indicators of time of death in a corpse. (Because you obviously can't determine the time of a person's death if they're still alive) I would like to point out that all of these indicators can only help you estimate the time of death, since many environmental factors can change the observed events. Hopefully, you won't come back with pitchforks and torches if you come across a dead person (as often as you do) and quickly induce the person's time of death, only to find out how wrong you were, based on what we've told you.

If you look closely enough, you can see the imminent, post-apocalyptic future. On the other hand, there are some neat skulls there. 

4. Livor Mortis

Livor Mortis is one of the first things you don't see on crime shows and movies, despite it being one of the first things that happen to a dead body. Livor mortis is the resultant color of a dead person's pooling blood at the work of gravity. What do I mean? Think of it this way, once you're dead, your heart stops beating. If your heart stops beating and your blood vessels stop moving, there is nothing to circulate your blood. Therefore, after you die, your blood simply flows down your once active blood vessels, into the lowest part of your body. (Regardless of body position.)

Livor mortis is clearly observed by a dark purpleish hue onto the skin in which the blood has flown and pooled. Depending on the time, this color can/will become permanently fixed onto the body in a matter of time. What this all means is that you can determine the position the person died, along with the the estimated time of death.

Don't worry, this is the most graphic picture in this article. (Even though I found hundreds of pictures of half-decomposing bodies everywhere, so you owe me one.)

After the first two to eight hours of death, lividity (pooling of blood in body) will be present on the body. However, it would be easily removed by pressing onto the afflicted area with a finger/any pressure. If the color disappears, the person probably died less than eight hours ago. If the color remains, the person must have died beyond the eight hour time frame.

Before you start jumping around like some type of leprechaun with your new-found knowledge, allow me to inform you about the factors that affect livor mortis. First off, the environmental temperature of the body can greatly influence how long it takes before lividity becomes permanent. If the temperature happened to be extremely cold at that time, livor mortis could be slowed down. (The opposite is true as well) Accessories and clothing such as tight belts and wristwatches could easily externally constrict blood passage as well, which can also slow down livor mortis.

Read more »

How To Survive a Long Fall

Haven't we all wondered what we would do in the worst case scenario of falling from a ten-story-building or plane? Of course you have, those horrifying nightmares of falling into the deep abyss, shortly before waking up and grabbing your bed in sheer terror have taught you better. But before you turn away and exclaim that surviving a ten-story fall is impossible, allow me to point out the hundreds of people that have survived even greater falls, after falling in a specific manner. (Both intentionally, and unintentionally.) So the next time you're standing six floors above the ground, remember these steps.

It'll be like this, but the smiles and excitement would be replaced by death.

1. Slow down your fall

Considering that earth's acceleration due to gravity is 9.81 m/s^2, you might want to consider slowing down your fall. But it obviously can't be as easy as snapping your heels together and expecting to find yourself in a luscious green forest alone. Actually, it can. All you need to do (and can do) is attempt to increase your surface area in order to allow good ol' air resistance to work its magic.

All you need to do is to spread yourself out, stomach facing the earth, head and legs reaching for the skies, arms outstretched, elbows and knees slightly bent, and you're as good as gold. You may have seen this position in the thousands of movies that have included sky diving, the difference is, you don't have a parachute. You can actually shave off up to 80 mph off your speed as you reach terminal velocity if you stay in this position instead of going head/feet down.

So, no. They don't do this to simply look lame.

However this step only applies to you if you're certain that you have 30 seconds or more of air time otherwise, you'll just end up landing in a awkward position.

Also: While you're anticipating impact, find a nice place to land

If all you see below you are large slabs of cement, you can attempt to direct your body towards another direction. As you can probably guess, hard, rough surfaces are possibly the worst places you can land. Look for long slopes or soft surfaces that can help absorb some of the force. Also, remember that when you're trying to move around, don't act like you're swimming in water; staying in the position described above, simply twist your body towards the direction you wish to go, like a plane or bird.

Did you know: If you fall from an airplane, you can get up to three minutes of fall time, which can give you a few miles of turning space before you hit the ground.

Read more »

3 Ways People Can Cyberstalk You And How You Can Avoid It

Don't we all get that feeling that we're getting stalked on our way home from work or school? Well worry not, you're probably not getting stalked at all. Why? Because it's so darn easy to stalk you online! The fact is, unbeknownst to you, the cumulative information about yourself that you put online, can really show a lot of personal information that you might not be willing to share to strangers. Unless you enjoy kidnapping, you should follow some of the tips provided below.

3. Facebook

Facebook is one of the most brilliant and easiest ways to get information about someone. There's no need to take out the detective hat and look for little strands of information about you around the deep edges of the internet while Facebook probably has a gigantic treasure box of information about you, all in one place for viewing convenience.

The way people usually use Facebook to cyber-stalk or cyber-spy on people is usually the simple "friend request method" in which you simply request a friend request in order to get access to your photos, statuses, and inner thoughts. The people most commonly susceptible to this method are those who try to get 1,000 friends online to make themselves seem more popular and social to their real friends. However, even tech-savvy internet users can still fall prey to this simple con.

It won't always be this obvious.

Read more »

4 Reasons Your Pictures Are Horrible

So you just bought that new camera and you're so excited to test it out. So you tell your friends to go hang out with you at the mall, and you proceed to take a few pictures as you run around without a care in the world. By the end of the day, your memory card is full and you're hyped up to see your pictures. You plug the USB cord in the computer, and look at your pictures. A small tear flows out of your eyes as you see consistently under-exposed and mysteriously colored pictures. Obviously, you bought the wrong camera right?

For the most part, the end result of a picture is more determined by the photographer, not the camera. You can blame that camera for being bad all you want, but at the end of the day, it's your fault.

Then again, it might be time for a replacement.

Read more »

How to Use Facebook To Destroy Your Future Career

Facebook is a lovely website, you can talk with friends, play games, and even find long lost siblings using surnames and pictures. What wondrous things can it do next? Ruin your chances for future employment? You bet it can! People of all ages can easily destroy their chances of landing that "ace job" in the future unknowingly on the facebook with a simple status update.

When a employer looks for a guy to work in their organization, they want a guy that is mature, productive, and can get the job done. If they didn't, employers would be walking around handing jobs out like pancakes. Going to a job interview, and handing in your resume isn't the end of the employment process. Sadly, they need to actually check if you really got four doctorate degrees at the age of sixteen. It's pretty difficult to bluff your way into working for NASA with a fake resume and a clean shirt.

"What do you mean I couldn't have won eighty Noble Prizes? I want this janitorial position!"

The truth is, companies run background checks, not just criminal history. They want to know if you're competent of basic work, and if you're sane. They don't want someone that wanders around drooling everywhere as they smash their keyboard with their own head during the lunch break. If you feel that I'm talking about you, I am.

Read more »

How to Annoy All of Your Friends on Facebook

Facebook? A book in which exquisite faces are placed in alphabetic order based on their series of letters that identify them as a individual? What great luck! Facebook has over 750 million users, and if you're reading this, you're probably a part of that population.

Statistically, average people have 130 friends in total. That's a bit too much right? Who needs a hundred thirty people who like you? Below, I'll help you "cut the fat" from you long friends list. Perhaps by the end of the month, you'll have more enemies then friends; That's when life really gets interesting.

•  Post like you're on twitter. Post status updates no less then once every hour. Everyone needs to know where you are and what you're doing, even if you're just brushing your teeth. If you found a song you like, or farted briefly, feel free to share it with the rest of the world.
• Post links, songs, stories, pictures on your profile frequently. Also, try to make status updates with philosophical truths you've found on the internet, and/or discovered yourself recently. Here are some examples:
• "Earth is only a speck in the universe"
• "We are essentially useless"
• "We can't change the past, so look towards the future"

You'll instantly look like this towards your peers.

Read more »

Tips On Cooling Your Mouth After Eating Spicy Foods

I know at one point on our lives, we've all eaten extremely spicy foods in till manly tears flowed down our cheeks. No more! Instead of holding back your tears, you'll be holding in your constipated feces from all the delicious foods you'll be enjoying.

What makes a average pepper become fear itself, is the chemical Capsaicin. When the chemical is ingested, it triggers the pain receptors in the mouth and indicates "heat". The body reacts in the same fashion if you were to put fire under your arm; Your body would kicks up adrenaline, increases heart rate, and perspire, except for the burning arm part.

Sorry for the inconvenience.

Despite Capsaicin having about a hundred hardcore uses such as pepper spray, riot control, possible prostate cancer treatment, and other such uses; This post is about soothing your mouth after eating ten too many spicy tacos.

Capsaicin is not water-soluble therefore, water alone won't stop the spicy burn from leaving your mouth. Fluids such as water may actually move some of the Capsaicin around making the burn slightly more intense after you swallow or spit out the water. Thankfully, Capsaicin is fat-soluble which allows substances such as milk to help 'soothe'  the burn.

Read more »

Doing your dishes the right way

I have only ever met one person on this lovely planet who enjoys doing dishes, and she is a weird little person. Dishes are the bane of many a man's (or monkeys, they may do dishes too, don't be a species-ist) existence; They are disgusting, they are sticky, they smell terrible, they contain the remnants of your Auntie Muriel's three bean meat surprise casserole, oh, and you get to clean all of them! Might as well change your name to Lucky. Anywho, you want to be done as soon as humanly (again with humans, we need words that incorporate animals, like turtlely, or snail.) possible. And here are the ace ways to do it. Oh, one more thing, dishwashers are cheating.

I don't think I need to describe what's happening here.

1. Use soap that cuts grease - You clean dishes with soap (and if you don't, please do not clean my salad bowl with that shoe you found on the corner), but you need the right soap. Hand washing soap, standard cleaning soap or lotion infused lavender lathers will not be as effective as a dish washing, grease cutting soap, such as Dawn. This will allow you to rub down dishes effectively without too much effort to remove that delectable cheese sauce.

Read more »

How to Avoid Spiked Drinks

Good job, you've just finished college and you're graduating at the top of your school! You've been invited to make a speech at a prestigious award ceremony at the White House and it's only about six hours away! So you go the bar, and some of your arch-nemesis follow you along and using your keen hearing, you eavesdrop them talking about spiking your drink in order to make you"unavailable" for the speech in an attempt to ruin your future career. So what do you do? Do you turn around, throw a glass of liquor at them, charge and grab their arms and legs, flip them over onto the tables, then wrestle knives out of their hands, and force them to either let go of the knife, or slit their own throat, or do you keep a "keener" eye out for your foes?

He'll be impressed. Also, dead.

In a "legal-er" sense, lets just keep a keen eye on them; saying that you eavesdroped on a conversation about spiking your drink won't stand well in court against four mutilated bodies with at least twenty witnesses on scene, two security camera footage, and sixteen camera phone recordings.

• Prefer unopened cans and bottles. Try not to accept any unopened cans or bottles from anyone. If you're going to have anyone open your cans or bottles, have it done in front of you, by a trusted friend, bartender, waiter, or waitress.
• Note strange tasting or discolored drinks. From your extensive career in drinking fluids, you should be able to tell the difference between a normal coke/pepsi and a purple-colored cyanide concoction. Note that many "date-rape" drugs are usually colorless, odorless, and tasteless.
• Always keep your eye(s) on your drink. They can't sneak anything funny in your drink if you stare intently at it for sixteen hours straight. At the very least, keep your drink in front of you all times.
• Don't leave your drinks unattended. Don't go off to the little boys room every six minutes and leave your drink unattended for anyone to insert anything into your drink.
• Don't share drinks. Even with trusted friends. For all you know, someone could be trying to rape your foolish, careless friends, only to have you drink the spiked drink in a frenzy of sharing.
• Examine your drink before drinking. If you see unusual bubbling, fizzling, or even half-dissolved pills in the bottom of your drink, don't drink it. Perhaps you left it on the counter, does it look tampered with? Did someone move your cup slightly to the right, or adjust your straw?
• Keep your palm over the open side of your cup. Don't hold it like a hipster with your hands on the sides, hold it with your hand on top. With your hand on top, it'll suddenly become a hundred times harder to sneak anything into your drinks while you are holding it. (When you're getting drunk, your alertness will suffer, during this time, someone could excrete feces into your cup without you knowing.)*
• Go to bars with friends. Not only does this result in a good game of beer pong, but having someone watching your back, makes it harder to kidnap you.

*experiences vary

Read more »

How to Get Rid Of Revolting Breath

Bad breath eh? Your breath smells like six decaying otters and decomposed human feces mixed with cat tails eh? Well, I may just be able to help you out.

Disgusting! I mean, look at that hair!

Although most of the time, the problem may be obvious, sometimes people don't even know their breath makes you want to commit manslaughter in a extremely violent fashion towards them. So in order to avoid nice Uncle Rick from becoming Convicted of Manslaughter Uncle Rick, lets make sure you don't have bad breath.

• The best/simplest possible way is to ask someone. It doesn't hurt to turn to your left/right and ask the person next to you. Heck, it doesn't hurt to go downstairs and ask your mom. Do us all a favor and ask someone for confirmation.

It also doesn't hurt to stop making stupid faces, this guy thinks he's better then me or something!

Now, how do we get rid of this curse of infidelity bad breath?

• Clean your tongue. Doctors tell you you brush your teeth all the time, but do they really take the time to tell you to clean your tongue? It's common knowledge that your tongue takes up more space then your teeth inside of your mouth. It's like a fuzzy carpet in your houses front door, all the microbes will most likely collect there as you go on with your day. In emergency cases while eating with your girlfriends/boyfriends parents, you can technically use a spoon to "scrape" your tongue.
• Thankfully, most toothbrush nowadays have tongue cleaners on the back of the 'handy device'. If you aren't fortunate enough to have one, you can simply brush your tongue after you brush your teeth.

• Floss. This won't simply help your breath but your general oral health as well. Why not get some bacon-flavored floss and have the time of your life? A warning though, your gums will bleed due to the fact that you don't floss often, not like gushes and fountains of blood, but it might get messy if you floss too hard/violently. (If you find that your gums are bleeding, and you've floss beyond your gums and have reached the bones of your mouth, perhaps you should go a little bit lighter, also you should go to the emergency room.)

Read more »

How to Deal With Mosquito Bites

Yesterday I took a short walk at a nearby park, I was having a nice day, and suddenly, ouch! My pinkie knuckle was suddenly pricked by a stinger of a darn mosquito! (I guess mosquito are attracted to pure muscle. Just kidding.) Anyways, how do we deal with these itchy monstrous red bumps?!

"OMOMOMOMOMOM"

• Wash the affected area. We don't want remaining saliva and irritants just standing around near the bitten area, wash it off! (With soap!)
• Put ice on the bitten area. After a mosquito bite, we usually don't feel anything in that spot for a period of time, if you place ice on it before you do, you can decrease swelling and pain. It's usually preferred to wrap a towel around the ice to prevent frostbite when you apply it to affected areas.
• Rub baking soda and water onto the affected area. (Remember, rub. Don't allow your rubbing result in severely strong scratching, you'll increase swelling.) Put enough baking soda and water to form a paste.
• Crush aspirin and water to create a paste as well, rub on affected area.
• Rub the inside gooey part of the banana peel onto the mosquito bite. Repeat as needed.
• Don't scratch the bite. Scratching the bite may result in infection or even scarring.
• Dab toothpaste onto the bite to reduce pain and itchiness.

Read more »

How to Avoid Imminent Death From Flying Debris

Does your family have a close relationship with early death by flying debris? If you answered yes, then you should laugh! Then put on your serious face, because things just got serious. You never know when your time's come to die immediately from flying debris. You could be on your way to work, when suddenly a flying tree branch smacks you hard on the right side of your face, effectively cracking your neck and leaving your lifeless cold corpse on the sidewalk.

An army of possibility..

In theory, any flying object can be classified as flying debris, so that ranges from a coffee mug, to your great uncle Tim. So that means, keep an eye on your surroundings, you never know what a tornado, hurricane, or some freak storm could pick up and throw directly towards you.

Read more »

How to Cure Insomnia

Can't fall asleep? Is it because of the lunar eclipse/full moon? Probably not. You may suffer from Insomnia, and you spend restless nights laying in your bed trying to fall asleep. Worry not! ollow some of these tips, and you'll be on your way to sleep.

Or maybe you're a werewolf. Just a thought.

Read more »

How to Take Quick Notes

So you're sitting in class, and your teacher's going on and on about triangles. I mean, get a job or something right? Well, your friend "Tom", needs you to copy down some notes because had to go to the doctors today. Darn Tom!

Well, if you want to take notes, follow these basic tips, and you'll be on your way on becoming the best note taker in the universe. 

• Write only what's important. If your teacher's talking about circles, and ends up talking about that one time he got completely drunk with his friends in college, you don't have to write that.
• Shorten. You don't need to write "because" or "due to the fact of" completely out in letters, sometimes you need those extra few seconds to catch up. For me personally, instead of actually using words to connect ideas, I use actual arrows to point at each other. For example, "man that killed tom -> bob."
• Use pictures. Can't remember how that word is spelled? Draw a picture. Don't spend precious time trying to remember if it started with a J, or a M. If tom climbed the mountain, "Tom climbed the ~^~"
• Emphasize what's important and what isn't. Though all your notes should be important, there are certain dates and names that are important to remember. Bolden, circle, or even double circle the things you know will be important in that upcoming test. Use things that will catch your eye when your skim your notes.

Everyone has different methods of taking notes, basing on whether they are a visual, audio or a kinestetic learner. Also, tell your friend to stop spending time "getting sick", and more time in school!

So you've got a ear infection every Thursday morning  for the past six years eh?

How to Treat Burns

Okay, so you're making your world famous chili, and you pour some out and you're walking to a table, and suddenly, your darn cat decides to attack you from behind. So you drop the chili all over yourself, and suddenly, you find yourself in burning agony. Today was a bad day to make chili.

Don't lean forward.

So what to do now? Wash it over some cold water, and move on with you life? Maybe.

Determine the severity of the burn. I mean, you don't want to go to the ER if you only "burned" your hand with a little warm water right?

• First Degree Burn - Only affects the outer portions of your skin (Epidermis), the skin is red and somewhat painful.
• Second Degree Burn - Occurs when the outer portion of your skin (Epidermis) is burned though, and the second layer has also been burned. They are much more painful then first degree burns, and usually are accompanied by swellings and blisters. If blisters occur, its usually not recommended to pop them yourself.
• Third Degree Burn - Most severe type of burn; occurs when the burn has burned passed the skin, and has reached the tissue of your body. Since the nerves have been destroyed in the skin, it is usually painless. The skin becomes dry and leathery, likely to be black, white or brown in color

Read more »

How to Get Get Up In The Morning

So you're late to school/work again? You're teacher/boss is threatening to deduct points/lower your pay? Well it's time to buy a baseball bat, and destroy their office  and put it in your closet, because it has nothing to do with this! If you've ever had a problem not falling back to sleep after waking up, try some of these suggestions.

Even statues get pretty sleepy.

Read more »