An Argument Against Multitasking

We're all busy people right? At the given opportunity, wouldn't it be better to hit two birds with one stone? To nail that upcoming final essay and build a sailboat with good ol' grandad? Of course! What could possibly go wrong with that? For one, you may find that both birds are only moderately injured and they come back with an avian army with a vengeance. Maybe you should have used two proper stones instead. Maybe six-ten stones to make sure they were dead would have been better.

Maybe calling your friends to bring their guns over would be a even better idea.

Recently, due to the technical buzz of the recent decade, people have found it more productive to do two, three things at once. But rather than support these self-destructive tendencies, we shall challenge them. Bluntly stated, multitasking is one of those things that accomplish the complete opposite of what you want to get done. The main idea of multitasking is getting the maximum amount of things done in a allotted amount of time. The problem is, you'll probably end up doing below your average levels of productivity by trying to do two or more tasks at once. Why? we'll tell you.

First off, you weren't multitasking in the first place; your brain simply cannot do two conscious tasks at the same time. In reality, your brain is actually doing one task and quickly transitioning to another so quickly that you cannot perceive it. When you're driving your car and texting on your phone, you're actually switching between texting and driving with the help of visual cues, (Such as bright headlights shining into your dashboard as you drive onto the wrong road) auditory cues, (Such as your phone ringing to alert you that somebody has responded to your hilarious comments) and other such cues from your various senses.

Maybe those cute owl pictures can wait until after you escape a high-speed pursuit by terrorists.

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Merry Christmas!

Why, hello there again. As you know, it's the end of the year and almost the start of the new one. But strangely enough, I believe that this weekend happens to include both Christmas Eve and Christmas. A yearly commemoration of the birth of Jesus Christ or another day to give gifts, sing songs, eat food, and love each other. Regardless of your reason for celebrating Christmas or even how you do it, it's one of those holidays meant to be enjoyed and remembered. Because of this, we wish you a Merry Christmas from this side of the internet, into your glowing computer screen.

On another note, we won't post any articles until the holiday is over on Monday. Why? Because Christmas is no time to be on the computer, reading strangely awesome articles from your neighborly blog, Skyakes. (Sadly enough.) Go and enjoy your weekend; we'll see you on Monday.

Merry Christmas,

Skyakes' Staff

3 Crazy Ways To Boost Your Immune System

As you know, it's winter. Thanks to the support of corporate advertisements on the media, you also know that everybody gets sick during the winter and therefore you should must buy brand-named tissues with expensive lotion inside of them. Putting those lotion smeared napkins aside, nobody wants to get sick right? Of course! You're a busy guy/gal with things to do and people to see; you don't have time for a nasty cold to punch you in your face when you least expect it. Below, I'm going to give you three "out-of-this-world" methods of boosting your immune system.

Unless they find you beyond this world.

Get Sick More Often

Don't worry, that's no typo. If you want to boost your immune system, don't fall into the social-norm of avoiding as much microbes as possible. Instead, expose yourself to as many diseases (non-fatal ones, obviously) as possible, in order to build up your passive defense. Do you enjoy sanitizing your phones and door knobs every weekend? Of course not! Just don't do it and embrace the disease! It's like taking the disease head-on, to settle the score once and for all.

Depicted: Being weak-sauce.

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3 Of The Worst Gifts Ever To Give On Christmas

As you can probably deduce from your cheery surroundings, Christmas is almost here. It's about time to reach deep in your pockets and buy gifts for the people you most care about. But before you pull out those glass pencil holders, allow me to introduce to you, the four worst gifts to ever gift to anyone. (Unless you despise them secretly and you wish to act passive aggressive towards them.)

3. Trinkets At The 99-Cents Store

What's that? A shiny glass pencil holder that I'll probably never use? Gee, thanks, I'll certainly use it- for a week. One thing that people love buying for their friends, co-workers, and even families at last moment occasions are small-to-large, moderately cheap items they find at the local dollar store or grocery store. We've all seen these gifts; they range from pens/pencil holders, elaborate snow globes that are malformed, or even a dozen "business" pens that have ink equivalent to the amount of water on the sun.

Why do they suck? First things first, the fact that you picked up the gift from your local dollar store shows almost no effort in gift buying. Worst yet, the gifts usually cost next to nothing,  usefulness equal to the cost, and physical quality striping any practical use of it. (If you can find any use for it in the first place.)

This, is a fire truck.

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How To Survive a Long Fall

Haven't we all wondered what we would do in the worst case scenario of falling from a ten-story-building or plane? Of course you have, those horrifying nightmares of falling into the deep abyss, shortly before waking up and grabbing your bed in sheer terror have taught you better. But before you turn away and exclaim that surviving a ten-story fall is impossible, allow me to point out the hundreds of people that have survived even greater falls, after falling in a specific manner. (Both intentionally, and unintentionally.) So the next time you're standing six floors above the ground, remember these steps.

It'll be like this, but the smiles and excitement would be replaced by death.

1. Slow down your fall

Considering that earth's acceleration due to gravity is 9.81 m/s^2, you might want to consider slowing down your fall. But it obviously can't be as easy as snapping your heels together and expecting to find yourself in a luscious green forest alone. Actually, it can. All you need to do (and can do) is attempt to increase your surface area in order to allow good ol' air resistance to work its magic.

All you need to do is to spread yourself out, stomach facing the earth, head and legs reaching for the skies, arms outstretched, elbows and knees slightly bent, and you're as good as gold. You may have seen this position in the thousands of movies that have included sky diving, the difference is, you don't have a parachute. You can actually shave off up to 80 mph off your speed as you reach terminal velocity if you stay in this position instead of going head/feet down.

So, no. They don't do this to simply look lame.

However this step only applies to you if you're certain that you have 30 seconds or more of air time otherwise, you'll just end up landing in a awkward position.

Also: While you're anticipating impact, find a nice place to land

If all you see below you are large slabs of cement, you can attempt to direct your body towards another direction. As you can probably guess, hard, rough surfaces are possibly the worst places you can land. Look for long slopes or soft surfaces that can help absorb some of the force. Also, remember that when you're trying to move around, don't act like you're swimming in water; staying in the position described above, simply twist your body towards the direction you wish to go, like a plane or bird.

Did you know: If you fall from an airplane, you can get up to three minutes of fall time, which can give you a few miles of turning space before you hit the ground.

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