4 Of The Most Annoying Facebook Posts

Chances are, you live in the 21st century, and if you do, you've probably heard of this website called Facebook. (If you haven't, it's a a wonderful marketplace for selling pastries and popsicles. You should check it out.) Inside of this website, it is likely to find millions of little devious creatures of the night that scratch comments onto mystical contraptions called "walls". Today, we're going to discuss the top four most annoying Facebook posts that are commonly seen in modern culture.

4. Passive Aggressive Posts

We can usually observe these activities among the weaker portion of the species. (Although all members are still susceptible) Late at night, often exhausted and beyond the normal capacity of logic and reason, these lifeforms fall into the perfect conditions needed to strike their foes passively with little to no shame or regret. Through extremely vague terminology, analogies, quotes, poems, we can easily discern the difference between these passive aggressive passages towards unknown individuals and   everyday articles from mom and pop. Here are some examples:

1. "wtf. i wish he would just leave my life 4ever."
2. "go shoot yourself."
3. "i saw her with him again today. if only i had a car........ rofl jk........... 6_6"

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How to Use Facebook To Destroy Your Future Career

Facebook is a lovely website, you can talk with friends, play games, and even find long lost siblings using surnames and pictures. What wondrous things can it do next? Ruin your chances for future employment? You bet it can! People of all ages can easily destroy their chances of landing that "ace job" in the future unknowingly on the facebook with a simple status update.

When a employer looks for a guy to work in their organization, they want a guy that is mature, productive, and can get the job done. If they didn't, employers would be walking around handing jobs out like pancakes. Going to a job interview, and handing in your resume isn't the end of the employment process. Sadly, they need to actually check if you really got four doctorate degrees at the age of sixteen. It's pretty difficult to bluff your way into working for NASA with a fake resume and a clean shirt.

"What do you mean I couldn't have won eighty Noble Prizes? I want this janitorial position!"

The truth is, companies run background checks, not just criminal history. They want to know if you're competent of basic work, and if you're sane. They don't want someone that wanders around drooling everywhere as they smash their keyboard with their own head during the lunch break. If you feel that I'm talking about you, I am.

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How to Annoy All of Your Friends on Facebook

Facebook? A book in which exquisite faces are placed in alphabetic order based on their series of letters that identify them as a individual? What great luck! Facebook has over 750 million users, and if you're reading this, you're probably a part of that population.

Statistically, average people have 130 friends in total. That's a bit too much right? Who needs a hundred thirty people who like you? Below, I'll help you "cut the fat" from you long friends list. Perhaps by the end of the month, you'll have more enemies then friends; That's when life really gets interesting.

•  Post like you're on twitter. Post status updates no less then once every hour. Everyone needs to know where you are and what you're doing, even if you're just brushing your teeth. If you found a song you like, or farted briefly, feel free to share it with the rest of the world.
• Post links, songs, stories, pictures on your profile frequently. Also, try to make status updates with philosophical truths you've found on the internet, and/or discovered yourself recently. Here are some examples:
• "Earth is only a speck in the universe"
• "We are essentially useless"
• "We can't change the past, so look towards the future"

You'll instantly look like this towards your peers.

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