Showing posts with label to own. Show all posts
Showing posts with label to own. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 1, 2012

3 Reasons To Get a Pocket Knife

With pocket knives having nothing to do with my recent obsessions, I'm here to present the case for getting a pocket knife (no secretive pocket knife lobbying here-- we're public about our pocket knife conglomerate sell out).  The thing is, the good ol' fashion pocket knife has found itself phasing away from everyday Joe's/Jane's pockets, despite its practical use. While a touchscreen phone with a highspeed internet access is useful in 65% of real-life situations (did you know that most statistics are created at-the-moment, 87.69% of the time? It's true!), nothing quite beats the "sharp edge" that a knife provides. Below, I'll discuss three reason to put a pocket knife in your "every-day-carry".

I totally didn't just use this image because it was open-domain. Totally not!

3. Practical Everyday Use


Haven't we all had that loose string in our shirt or jacket, that threatened the entire livelihood of our garments? With the heart-pumping stress of sharply pulling down on the loose string, and possibly risking the rapid unraveling of your sweater at the start of your day, wouldn't it be better if you had a unspecified sharp apparatus that could effectively cut such a problem? Along with cutting loose strings, a handy pocket knife can easily help you open envelopes, cardboard boxes, and even hard-to-open plastic packaging.

Look at all those uneven wrinkles and creases! Won't anyone think of the children?!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

4 Reasons To Own A 50.Caliber Anti-Material Sniper Rifle

You know what's the big gift of 2011? Anti-material sniper rifles. It's the rage for the almost everyone age group! I mean, they're sold out in almost every corner store imaginable. But for some strange reason, some people believe that we shouldn't put anti-material rifles in the hands of everyday Joe. Obviously, they are terrorist. Because only terrorist would want to remove that spark in your little boy's eye when he opens his Christmas present, and find a McMillan Tac-50 sniper rifle.

4. DIY Pest Removal

Don't we all hate those annoying ants/cockroaches/rats living under your floor? All of them running amuck in your house, throwing parties while you sleep, all while not even contributing to the rent. If only there was a sure-fire way to get rid of them. See, pest-removal services cost a pretty dime, but a single .50 BMG 12.7x99mm NATO round will only set you back a few bucks.

So lets say you have rats and they've been running around excreting their feces everywhere, smearing as much as they can on your couch, and you know where their nest is located. Would you rather get on all fours with a broom in hand, or fire a single .50 caliber bullet into the wall, effectively destroying the entire nest with everything in it. Those rats are going be too busy being dead, to be coming back anytime soon.


"What rats?"